Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Week 1!!!!

So it's been a week (almost!) and it's all been real chill. I thought I'd be an emotional wreck, or maybe it hasn't hit me yet.

I got my unemployment debit card today. Technically I am still "employed" so when I fill out my claims, I put the income that I have made and that I will make this week. It takes a long time for benefits to go into affect, so I am glad I filled when I did even if I can't get the money until June starts. I am keeping careful track of all the jobs I apply to. I am not really going hard, I apply to jobs I'd like to work. I am really trying to change states. So we will see.

My days are real chill. I get up, work the online job for a few hours, then I watch tv. Sometime in the afternoon, I get back on and work some more. During that time, I run through the usual spots looking for jobs. I try to think of MORE places to go but it's a bust. I eat a rather healthy lunch since I am at home. I wake up at 7, go to bed at 12. The oddest thing of it all is that I sleep straight through the night. I haven't slept a whole night through in years! But the past week, I have been real calm. I feel more centered, more focused (on what?!? who knows...lol). I am not bothered. I do get anxious at times, and then it fades when I say to myself "The Lord will make a way!" I think I should be more worried but what does it help?!?

My plan today was to wash my hair. But I didn't. I just laid in bed. I downloaded Maxwell's new song and damn if it wasn't $1.29 on itunes. I was shocked since most songs are 99 cents. However, I had a gift card for $25 I am still chipping away at. Hopefully I will win another. I hate paying for music. I will pay for a live show, but music for my IPOD?!? please.

I also volunteered to work Afram this year. Now this is slightly crazy of me since Afram is 4th of July weekend. I didnt think that through but fuck it, what else I got to do?!? I am trying to go back to Americorp but haven't found anything great yet. I like that organization because they pay back part of your student loans and I NEED that!

It's amazing how chill I am. I am waiting on the melt down. I mean, yeah I cried the day I lost my job but I don't think it has fully hit me yet.

I hope it doesn't.

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